You hold your compassion and your tenderness close to your chest - like it is a gift that should only be given on special occasions...
When did you start to think that by withholding your love and affections that you would protect yourself?! Open your eyes! You aren't living - you aren't smiling and laughing and throwing yourself at the world - daring it to challenge you. No, instead you have become the world. You have become dark, and withdrawn, and hard. You've become that which hurt you, and because of your misguided conception of peace and safety you are doing to others as was done to you.
Can't you see?
I love you. You are wonderful. You are strong. You are powerful. You are kind. You are everything that is good. And there's so much that I want to show you....
I want to show you how to play in the fall leaves. How to dance in the downpour. How to throw back your head and laugh on the mountain tops. How to sob in the valleys... I want to show you how to feel again.
Can't you see?
Life is so beautiful, and you are hiding from it. Please, take my hand and step out of the shadows. Laugh with me and sing with me. You don't have to trust me. I might hurt you. But you see, that's what makes this all so wonderful. It's what makes the happy moments so much sweeter - because you have chosen to share a piece of yourself with someone else, and they have valued it. And if they don't, then move on to someone else who does.
Can't you see?
You aren't fighting by holding onto the past. You aren't fighting by becoming hard and distant. You aren't fighting by tucking yourself close to your chest and away from the world. No, you have given up the fight. To fight is to go against the current! To fight is to glare into the face of potential pain and continue forward! You have not won, you have hidden. Hidden behind your anger. And your fear. And the injustices you have faced.
Come out!
Please! This is a battle worth fighting. Don't you see!? There is joy on the other side. There is healing. There is a life you have given up hope on. It's not too far away. It's not impossible to reach. It's not out of range. You can still have that! Yes, there's been pain... I know that there's been pain... Pain you don't even admit to at times... But you see, that pain could make possible joys so much sweeter, if you would just push through.
Just because the night is dark, do you refuse to turn on the lights in the morning? NO! You stumble around your room looking for the light switch, and once you find it you fling it on - casting the night away! Just because you have been, and maybe are still in, a dark situation does not mean there is not light. Don't give up on your dreams because the path to get to them is different than you thought it would be. Please, don't give up.
Have courage, dear heart. Have courage.
