Plan #2 - Spoil

I got to thinking...

Part of the problem with this whole situation is that I felt used. I felt like I meant nothing. Like I was nothing. THAT was the problem. Physically, I was safe. Emotionally, I was not.

So, what do you do when the world treats you like trash for no good reason? Well, I figured I'd just start treating myself better than that.

The way I see it - if I can't count on others to treat me well and value who I am, than I would simply have to value myself.

I'm learning, every day, to take the time to do something that makes me feel beautiful. Even if that just means tweezing my eyebrows! At first I felt foolish.. Why was I wasting time on superficial beauty? Why was I putting my energy in something so selfish as me?

But you see, it's not about being selfish. It's about having self pride. About saying that you are worth the time and attention. It's about wanting to look your best because you value who you are. Think about it - if you love and value a dear friend in your life, do you not take the time out every now and then to go for a walk with them? Or go to get your nails done? Or do your hair together? You're showing her that you value her. Why on earth do we not treat ourselves with the same respect?! 

And you know what? As I've learned to take the time to do something that makes me feel beautiful, my mindset is changing and I'm unconsciously expecting others to treat me better. I'm expecting others to treat me with respect and difference. Not in a conceited way, but because I now have a standard. I was on the verge of thinking that I deserved no better than what I had received in the past. That it was a reflection of who I am that all these things happened to me. NO! No, it's not. It's a reflection of who they are. They made the choice. They didn't listen. They showed no honor. It is not a reflection of  who you are when others treat you bad... The reflection of who you are is how long you allow them to treat you bad. 

Angry - by TB LaBerge